the car and the fly

guy invites woman over for dinner. he even offers to pick her up and take her to his place. he makes a large turkey dinner and gives her lots of wine. his plan is to feed/booze her up so much that when he drives her home she falls asleep in his car and he can feel like a confident/protective man like in the buick commercials. he wants to imagine his 89' corolla being an '89 buick le sabre and he drives down winding roads and smiles assuredly over the woman knowing that both he and she will be safe as they cruise along in his luxury sedan. he then remembers the rest of the commercial involves childen in the backseat also sleeping and soon the car turns into a stained cloth seats sticky with grape juice, cracker, crumbs, and three gallons of bubble fluid that turned the whole back seat into a slip and slide for a week. the fantasy fades, but the man is still intent on asking the woman out. he needs to project the confidence of a man who drives a stylish yet safe automobile. this is what women look for; a cautious cat with a flair for the dramatic. he walks toward the woman with long strides until her realizes his fly is down. doesn't know how to act. where to go. she has made eye contact with him. what to do in such a situation. fake sack scratch? say something like, it's drafty in here, try to be discreet, walk away, ask her to zip it for him, ask her to reach in for a special surprise, ask her if it's noticeable, ask her if it turns her on, ask her if she would like to do the same to her own pants, ask her if she ever wished her vagina had a zipper or perhaps a zip loc seal to ensure freshness. all his ideas sound dynamite, it is now only a matter of choosing which one.