the 27

"I have to put a catheter in a 450 pound woman and it's a five man job. one guy for each leg, one to hold a flashlight, and then i have to dive in there and figure out where the catheter goes."

"i see a lot of vaginas and it's horrible."

"i have to inspect 80 year old breasts."




"do you listen to your own music?"

"i don't make music."



"i got to see old german balls."

"my hairdresser is a lesbian and she tells me to spread my legs when she cuts my bangs."

"This guy is huge and always holds my head and puts it on his chest when he talks to me."

"The cookies look they were made by a retard."

"I'm always late...I hope I'm not pregnant."